Show #009: Like a 74-Year-Old Woman

The ninth episode of our podcast, Paul and Storm Talk About Some Stuff for Five to Ten Minutes (On Average), is now online.

In this episode: our imminent defeat, albeit one we can live with; the hometown gig post-mortem, and our appropriateness (or lack thereof) as a “date band;” Storm is not a very good Jew; the Great Pajama Debate remains contentious, but then détente; Paul knows only three English cities, although two of them are actually counties; and a discussion of toys, both received and unreceived.

Audience participation alert! Please answer the poll at the bottom of this post; also, post your comments below regarding “the toy you never got” and/or “the toy you did get.”

Featured post-show song: “William Brown” – Randy Newman

Show #009: Like a 74-Year-Old Woman (Some content NSFW)


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[poll id=8]


  1. Adam H
    Posted September 29, 2008 at 11:25 pm | Permalink

    Fear not my friends, I am only 20 and I too both desired and did not receive Mr. Armstrong. I did, however, get a Fetch Armstrong, his beloved canine companion…although this was extremely anti-climatic, as within 24 hours of purchase I had already punctured the poor mutt and he bled corn syrup all over the floor. The package assured me that if I put a band-aid over the wound that he would heal, but even at such a young age I knew that was bull. Anyways though, that desire is probably more of a testament to Stretch’s eternal awesomeness that he managed to overcome generation separation.

  2. Posted September 29, 2008 at 11:52 pm | Permalink

    The only toy I remember specifically really wanting and not getting was a Sit-n-Spin. The one I remember wanting and getting was a game called Get Off My Back. It was a big plastic turtle; you took turns piling little plastic pelicans on his flat back. It would reach a tipping point where the last pelican would cause the turtle to lower and move forward, under a little cardboard bridge, and knock all the pelicans off.


  3. Jack F
    Posted September 30, 2008 at 5:24 am | Permalink

    The greatest toy of all time was the Batman Exploding Bridge. ( Even though my siblings and I are now in our 30s and 40s, we still ask for it every year at Christmas.

  4. JoAnn in VA
    Posted September 30, 2008 at 6:16 am | Permalink

    I always wanted the game Mousetrap, and bought one second hand as a teen…but a few key pieces were missing of course, so I coulnd never get the full Rube Goldberg effect like in the commercials. *sigh*

  5. LilMarauder
    Posted September 30, 2008 at 8:19 am | Permalink

    I remember a fireman helmet I got for Christmas in 1990, it had a working siren and rotating light on top- one day in January I couldn’t find it, my mom told me that the monster in the basement got it.
    I recently got a job in a toy store, so I’m in the wonderful position of being able to buy everything I did not receive as a wee kinder. My first purchase was a MONDO superball (bigger than a softball, about one pound, and bouncy)

  6. Posted September 30, 2008 at 1:35 pm | Permalink

    Darn, I want to change my vote, the pronounciation explanation isn’t clear enough for non-americans!

    We say pah-jAA-muhs here (NZ) but the A is a more British A.

  7. Alex
    Posted September 30, 2008 at 1:41 pm | Permalink

    The toy that I have always wanted would be a dart gun, that kind that Calvin has in Calvin & Hobbes.
    I have gotten water pistols though.

  8. Avril
    Posted September 30, 2008 at 4:21 pm | Permalink

    When I was a young girl, I desperately wanted a My Little Pony magic castle, if that was not possible I just wanted to get a baby pony to match my big pony. Sadly I didn’t get either, my Sister got the baby pony that matched her pony and I got one that did not even remotely resemble my big pony. I was devastated. Of course now I don’t care, but at the time it was a dark dark day.

  9. Avril
    Posted September 30, 2008 at 5:59 pm | Permalink

    This was what I wanted

  10. Colleenky
    Posted October 1, 2008 at 12:58 am | Permalink

    I so wanted a Matchbox race track when I was little girl. I remember playing with my older bother’s set. Once. One of my favoritest toys – and I didn’t even ask for it – was the Donny and Marie TV Show Playset

  11. Colleenky
    Posted October 1, 2008 at 1:09 am | Permalink

    P.S. In a fit of nostalgia, I just repurchased the playset on eBay. I still have my old Donny and Marie dolls. 🙂

  12. Ann
    Posted October 1, 2008 at 1:17 pm | Permalink

    When I was about 5, I wanted Voltron: the one with all 5 lions you assembled into the big figure. The year I was *this* close to getting it, there was a recall because of lead paint or something. Yeah, whatever Mom. I also never got my hands on a Nintendo NES but instead got the used, hand-me-down Atari 2600 which was well past its prime by then and is prolly still in my parent’s attic.
    Voted for pa-JAH-mas: Jersey accents represent 🙂

  13. Posted October 1, 2008 at 4:17 pm | Permalink

    Moving off the toy topic for a minute.

    Yes, I was listening (though not until Wednesday night). Thanks, guys, you made my night!

  14. Posted October 1, 2008 at 4:36 pm | Permalink

    When you called Lena “one of our oldest fans” you meant her chronological age, right? I always tell her she’s too old for me.

  15. Posted October 1, 2008 at 5:26 pm | Permalink

    toy i wanted: NES, the toy i got: Compaq 386sx.
    oh, yea, little bro just start college and he wanted a tickle-me-Elmo.

  16. Posted October 2, 2008 at 6:42 am | Permalink

    Here is a poem.

    4 weeks to the day
    of acknowledgment day
    of Felicia Day

    That was a poem.

    Still, it can’t be a real event unless it exists on Facebook, srsly.

    @Storm: I suck at remembering dates and things as well, but luckily I can rely on this neat online calendar thing at with the option of things like RSS feeds, text messages, mailing lists, and other cool things. (Go to “Click here to set your location” at the top of that page first)

    74-year-old women seem to sound exactly like “The Internet”, according to the impression of The Internet at the Cleveland show. And I know “that’s exactly like what the Internet sounds like” – someone, I think Storm or Coulton, said so.

    I’ve never called anything “jammies,” personally.

    Here’s the thing about pronunciation – I’m foreign – I was born in Europe (thought I have been American since July 2001). Yet, I still say pa-JAA-mas.

    I don’t remember particularly asking for any toy that I didn’t get. I was pretty big into computers early. I guess I got a computer – it wasn’t mine though. I didn’t have my own computer until maybe 3-5 years ago.

    I don’t know what Teddy Ruckspin (sp?) is. I never got Tickle Me Elmo. I never really had Super Nintendo either. The first console I had was the Nintendo 64. The last console I got was a Sega Dreamcast.

    Good show guys. Very fun to listen to on my commutes or during my procrastinations (or lunch, that’s a good time too).

  17. Posted October 3, 2008 at 10:13 am | Permalink

    “The Ballad of Rufus Amos Adams” explores the humor in the dull, the mundane, the entirely expected. I see a philosophical connection between this and the humor in “What’s the baby using? 25!” But I have come to see MANY connections between things and “What’s the baby using? 25!”

    4’33” by John Cage.

    It’s the humor of calling out what is boring and then just continuing to do it! That’s twisted, dull and hilarious!

    Andy Kaufman lip-syncing “The Mighty Mouse Theme.”

    There is something very funny and clever about the unfunny and overly simple concept of watching someone wait for their moment to lip sync just one line. Again, what’s the baby using? 25!

    I prefer the term “Jamaloons,” or if I’m feeling whimsical, “Rama-lama-jamaloons!” It’s a portmanteau word. And “Pantaloons,” you can’t help but smile when you say it. “Jamaloons” or “Pajamaloons” is almost as fun to say.

    I think the Pajama/Pajahma debate was settled MANY years ago with the phrase, “Lets call the whole thing off.” We can dig up Ira Gershwin and ask him, I guess.

    Next week, please discuss Potato versus Potatoe. (See, how I put the twist on that? Funny, eh?) Seriously, even though there is the question, “Is Sarah Palin a bigger idiot than Dan Quayle?”, looming over our heads, please don’t. I will call myself out on this one for you, “Boring!”

    Tickle Me Elmo is twelve years old. So the three year olds who got that toy are now in High School! My how time flies when you are buying useless crap for you kids that they MUST HAVE for Christmas!

    I can see how “William Brown” influenced “Rufus Amos.” This reminded me of “Texas Girl and the Funeral of Her Father.”

    Finally, I suggest changing the name of your podcast to “Paul and Storm Talk About Stuff” and each week change the subtitle of the show to reflect the ACTUAL Average Time of your podcast. Currently that average is [20:24m]. I just took the average time of the podcasts. I didn’t subtract the time you were playing music or the time you were pausing and nobody was talking. I thought that might be too retentive.

  18. Posted October 3, 2008 at 1:33 pm | Permalink

    This wasn’t a big purchase type of gift, but I never got the ‘Mickey Unrapped’ music cassette even though I wanted it. Instead I got the Lion King sing-a-long book/cassette, and after being incredibly upset over not getting what I wanted I started to love those songs.

  19. Alexander
    Posted October 4, 2008 at 3:29 am | Permalink

    Haha! I’m 19 and I actually did get a Stretch Armstrong, though I didn’t desire one particularly. My memory is so terrible I don’t remember any specific toy that I really wanted, besides video games of course 😛

    Also, while I’m originally from Maryland I actually live in England so it’s “puh-JAH-mas” all the way for me.

  20. Posted October 5, 2008 at 9:05 pm | Permalink

    I guess my desire for toys wasn’t as strong as other kids’, because I asked for various kinds of pets. I finally got my tiny white mouse for Christmas one year, but. was always denied a pony

  21. Mark Smith
    Posted October 6, 2008 at 1:42 pm | Permalink

    Toy I never got: Tommy Gun – A machine gun you pulled a bar on the side to prime and pull the triger and it shot 20-30 times.

    What I got: Repeating rifle that used caps. Great while I had a supply of caps. Bummer otherwise.

    Grew up in Rhode Island pajaaamas all the way.

  22. Gwyn
    Posted October 10, 2008 at 5:37 am | Permalink

    I begged and begged for a Barbie for my 8th birthday. After all, every red-blooded American girl plays with them! All those TV commercials showed me so.

    There she was, perched on top of my birthday cake. Only it turned out, I had no idea of what to *do* with it, and I went back to my microscope and reading.

  23. PG
    Posted March 4, 2009 at 8:24 am | Permalink

    Man, after this podcast I feel like we grew up in the same town, or perhaps just met at this new place called “the mall” that they just built. Anyway- I had the Stretch Armstrong AND the stunt bike. We used to like to put stretch in the freezer before playing with him. I guess we shouldn’t have been surprised when he sprung a leak.

    By the way- I grew up outside Boston, where we definitely said “puh-JAH-mas” and not “pa-JAA-mas”. We also said “take a bahth” and not a “baath”. Oh- and we drank “tonic”, not “soda”, or God forbid this stuff we hear is called “pop”.

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