This week’s episode: revisiting “lost” technology; a scandal is (hopefully) defused; a discussion of teachers covers bobsleds, phallic symbols and Henry David Thoreau; Paul uses the word “ascetic” more or less correctly; doing things; a full recounting of our respective jobs; carpe-ing the diem in college; and a bit o’ Peeps.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Did you ever have any annoying or unusual teachers?

Show #078: Racing the Pizza

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This week’s episode: a meta-analysis of the three branches of content our show tends to take; ruminations on birthdays, surprises, a wonderful birthday movie, and getting older; the NEW CD (!), “Do You Like Star Wars?” is on its way (with artwork by Molly Lewis), along with a new t-shirt and USB drive; recounting the last half of our West Coast trip, including terrible Canadian coffee; and w00tstock 2.2 in Chicago and w00tstock 2.3 in Minneapolis are officially announced. (Hooray!) Also, absent technology.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What “milestone” birthdays did/will affect you? And what technology was better/available previously and worse/unavailable now (a la Concorde)? Also, if you’re a minion and didn’t receive notice of the “Joss Whedon Birthday Message” prank, send us your e-mail address (along with your minion designation, so we can match them up).

Show #077: Dozens of Fake Joss Whedons

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The question is, what song(s) should be there? We can’t put them all up—that would take too long, and several of them are not very good. And some songs, while fun, are not very “Rock Band”-able. (For example, “The Captain’s Wife’s Lament” and “Nun Fight“, while a blast, are mostly just vocals, making things very boring for the people playing bass and drums)

So we turn to you, dear readers: please take a minute to look at the following poll. We’ve chosen a few of what we think are our most RB-friendly songs; let us know which (if any) you’d like to see on the Rock Band Network. Or feel free to suggest other songs. (Only ones we’ve written, please)

UPDATE: Please note, “Opening Band” is already available on Rock Band.

So I turn 40 tomorrow. (Hooray for me.) As it turns out, my devious (read: wonderful) wife planned a surprise party for me this past weekend. As part of this celebration, my life partner Storm put together this awesome birthday video for me.

While I’m never very good at sincerity, I genuinely wish to thank all our friends who took part, and the many more who couldn’t but sent their well-wishes. (Hey, Hodgman: still waiting on that pen you promised me) If a man must get a year older every 365 days (give or take), this is the way to do it.

And SUPER-THANKS to Storm, who spent a lot of time assembling this thing. Also: watch your back, Swarthy Stage-Left Man; you’re next.

So please enjoy; it’s about 19 minutes long, but well worth your time if you like funny things.

Thanks, everyone!

- P.

(P.S. Trying this new Wordpress 2.9+ “auto-embed” thing; in theory, the video should appear just below this text; let us know if you can’t see it)

Friday, May 7: The Moore Theatre, Seattle, WA – http://bit.ly/w00tseattle
Saturday, May 8: The Aladdin Theater, Portland, OR – http://bit.ly/w00tportland

NOTE: If you wish, you can avoid Ticketmaster extortion surcharges by purchasing tickets at the venue box offices. Contact The Moore and The Aladdin directly for details.

This week’s SOOPER-SIZED, extra-special episode: a rare “in the same room” podcast in (of all places) a casting office, along with good friends Kim Evey (producer of “The Guild” and star of “Gorgeous Tiny Chicken Machine Show“) and Greg Benson (of the hilarious Mediocre Films); scallions and spring onions; childhood near-death experiences are dwelt upon; pitying child actors; adventures in miscasting; Paul climbs up his own arse again, but turns it around and climbs up Kim’s & Greg’s instead; paying attention to comments (or not); viral videos (boobs);

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Should we put up the video of the four of us sitting in a room?

Show #076: I Should’na Even Stopped Here!

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In celebration of the holiday, we offer our song “Lose the Gonads” for ABSOLUTELY FREE! Please feel free to download it and share it with all your friends—we just ask that you please share the link to the Humane Society’s Spay Day page at the same time.

Enjoy, and please spay and neuter your pets!

Lose the Gonads

Using three different designs from Uncle Storm’s animated children’s story, “The Five Little Pickles” (artwork by Len Peralta), range of shirt styles and colors is available, including some just…FOR THE LADIES.

Also available as a stylish mug.

You can browse the three options in our CafePress Store, cleverly labelled Option 1, Option 2 and Option 3.

See you tonight, Desert People!

Watch in native Flash (best quality*), or on YouTube (could potentially generate us some revenue).

And of course it’s released under a Creative Commons license, so share the joy!

* HOWEVER: if you have a slow monitor (like Storm does), you may experience some lag if the video window is blown up large.

This week’s rather introspective episode: we recount our Texas adventures (both culinary and travelary) and respective health setbacks; salsa and Paul’s travel luck; mutual bitchin’ about snow, and a tortured metaphor; embarrassing moments involving Al Haig and flying beer (not necessarily both at the same time); and a super-secret (shhh!) announcement about the next w00tstock shows. Also, werewolves, and Paul’s phone rings.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: whom would you suggest as possible guests for our upcoming Seattle and Portland w00tstock shows?

Show #075: Reclining Up

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Check it out below, or click right here. You can also watch the hi-larious behind-the-scenes hijinks. Show business!

This week’s episode: further burger deliberations; Storm vows not to discuss food, then immediately starts discussing food some more; capitalizing on snowstorm panic; “Sickey Mickey” and vomiting on Muppets; fart jokes and the relative humor thereof; Paul’s aimless Pulp Fiction story; some “Lost” geekery, and much ado about cookies.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Where should we eat while in Dallas, Austin and Houston? Also, what mysteries do you *definitely* want solved before “Lost” ends its run?

Show #074: I Threw Up on Mahna Mahna

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This week’s episode: Storm sails alone; places you should eat; gummy food; burger controversy; and the third installment of “Emily and the Really Sexy Vampyre“.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: In-N-Out or Five Guys?

Show #073: Rockin’ the Dim / Emily Part 3

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This week’s episode: we bitch a little about Skype (fabulous, free technology); Storm addresses some responses to last week’s podcast; the pronunciation of “root” and other regional funkiness; recounting Florida experiences both wonderful and horrible; Storm questions his douchebagginess; old-school video-gaming; yummy, yummy tacos; and finding your friends in Anathem.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: How do you pronounce “root?” What other regional pronunciation/terminology issues have you run into? Also, is Storm a douchebag?

Show #072: Taco Cart

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The first way involves private detectives, stalking, an ambush and getting arrested. The second, much easier way is to come to one of our upcoming live performances, sit there patiently while we make some noise, and then shake our hands after the show while we sell you some CDs and shirts and crap. This latter path is far more socially acceptable, and is much preferred by us.

And exactly where are we performing during the first half of the new year? Funny you should ask; we have a list right here. As you can see, pretty much all of these dates are with Jonathan Coulton. (The compromising photos we have of him are safely locked away in a vault, until such a time as he refuses to let us perform with him anymore) And they are, as always, subject to change.

Orlando, FL – The Social
Thursday, January 14 at 7 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/3Teu0M
Note: There is no seating at this show, so bring your feet. Avoid service charges by buying at the box office M/W/F, or pay only $1 service charge when you buy at Park Avenue CDs.

St. Petersburg, FL – Nova 535
Friday, January 15 at 8 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/2Zr956

Atlanta, GA – Variety Playhouse
Saturday, January 16 at 8:30 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/1Wfbbo
Note: Service charge only $2.25 when you buy through the venue’s ticket club, or $1 for credit at the box office, or $0 for cash at the box office.

San Francisco, CA – Great American Music Hall
Friday, January 22 at 9 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/3uE2HO
Note: Service charge only $1 at the box office.

San Francisco, CA – Great American Music Hall
Saturday, January 23 at 9 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
SOLD OUT! (NOTE: You might be able to purchase some last-minute tickets at the box office the night of the show, but no promises)

Dallas, TX – Granada Theater
Thursday, February 4 at 7 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/5xUH5E

Austin, TX – Antone’s
Friday, February 5 at 8 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/mhGdL

Houston, TX – Zilkha Hall
Saturday February 6 at 8 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets on sale Friday, January 15

Scottsdale, AZ – Martini Ranch
Thursday February 18 at 7:30 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/83BHEu
Note: Limited GA seating

San Diego, CA – Anthology
Friday February 19 at 7:30 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/8gx5KW

Los Angeles, CA – Largo
Saturday February 20 at 8 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: Call box office at 310-855-0350

Los Angeles, CA – Largo
Sunday February 21 at 8 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: Call box office at 310-855-0350

Vancouver, BC – Rio Theater
Thursday February 25 at 7:30 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/6v7It8

Seattle, WA – Moore Theater
Friday February 26 at 8 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/6q1UIw

Portland, OR – Aladdin Theater
Saturday February 27 at 8 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/6sQSkR

Alexandria, VA – The Birchmere
Friday March 12 at 7:30 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/4TgXNf

Boston, MA – PAX East
Somewhere there in 3/26-3/28
Details TBA
bit.ly/4QUIVa

New York, NY – Highline Ballroom
Friday April 2 at 7 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/83dtU0

New York, NY – Highline Ballroom
Saturday April 3 at 7 PM
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: bit.ly/7ocm6D

This week’s episode: with Paul mediating over at NBC, Len Peralta guest co-hosts; juggling creative projects, like Monster By Mail and Flipface and Rifftrax; Conan is the New Coke; Leno does soap operas; kosher Coke, Mexican Coke, savory Cokes, and soda terroir; snowy Cleveland; awesome and disappointing places; do you like Star Wars? (an apology and explanation); and the great Muppet revival.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Do you like Star Wars?

Show #071: Do You Like Star Wars?

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This week’s episode: An odd anniversary; some shout-outs (what-what!); Storm jumps on the BSG train; yummy shakes and the Wilton Candy Kitchen; wrestlers from our youth; the overweening influence of Harrison Ford characters, especially on Storm; and Paul’s youthful pornography education.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What person(s)/character(s) do you believe yourself to be/model yourself after/wish you were ?

Show #070: Chinwhipper (Some content NSFW)

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This week’s longest-ever episode (sorry again, guys!): Scooby-Doo- and Fear Factor-style holidays; Christian ham and non-pig ham; debriefing the It Might Be Xmas project; putting “pod” in front of everything; and we jump on the year-end/decade-end “Top Ten Lists” bandwagon, with Storm taking it seriously, and Paul taking his usual lackadaisical approach.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Feel free to submit your own Top Ten List of whatever. And what should our bracketed tournament for 2010 be?

Show #069: Twirlable Moustaches (Some content NSFW)

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In the spirit of the season, please enjoy this song (from our It Might Be Xmas project):

Christmas Eve Eve

This week’s episode: no Paul, lots of snow, It Might Be Xmas marches on, and a really sexy vam-PYRE, as read here in Part 2 of “Emily and the Really Sexy Vampyre” (which is now up to Part 6.)

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Have an awesome Christmas, stay safe, and/or tell us about your non-traditional holiday traditions or celebrations.

Featured post-show song: “Christmas Eve Eve” by Paul and Storm

Photo by Nathan Gibbs http://www.flickr.com/photos/nathangibbs/3081244599/

Show #068: Trying To Be All Blasè (Some content Really Sexy)

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This week’s episode: the magic of numbers; our latest project; our other latest project ,for Coverville; the danger of being coy with one’s self; the art of dreading things; and Xmas recommendations and British comedy.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What are some of your favorite/least favorite holiday memories (music, shows, movies, etc.)?

Featured post-show song:  “Backward Santa” by Paul and Storm

Show #067: DARPA Hoverboards (Some content NSFW)

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Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday from December 11 until Christmas (that’s the 25th), we’ll release at least one new and COMPLETELY ORIGINAL song, each written in a different TMBG style and exploring the many facets of the holiday season. Visit our special It Might Be Xmas (IMBX) page at Bandcamp.com to listen and download the tunes for FREE (though of course contributions are always welcome, at your discretion on the Bandcamp page).

As we are NOT CHARGING YOU ANY MONEY AT ALL (if you so choose) for any of these songs, we would ask that you please share the files and website with anyone and everyone you think would enjoy it. You can do it, it’s totally legal, because the songs are all written by us and released under a Creative Commons license. (Details on what that means are here; but the short version is that you can freely copy and distribute the songs as long as you’re not making any money doing so)

And because we don’t want a full-on geek riot (or if your reaction is “Huh???”), please see the FAQ after the break if your first reaction is “I hate you I hate you I hate you die die die.”

What in the heck is a They Might Be Giants?
They Might Be Giants (or TMBG, as the kids call them) is an alternative rock band formed by John Flansburgh and John Linnell. They are extremely popular among geeks, nerds and Internet types for their smart, quirky music. For more information, read their Wikipedia page, their website, and/or their own wiki, This Might Be a Wiki.

Why TMBG?
Like Randy Newman, TMBG have been a big influence on us, so they were a natural choice. That, and we’ve always felt that the holidays are made for TMBG.

But I wanted to hear more Randy Newman theme songs
Tuff nuts.

[Song x, some part of song y, or the entire project which we'll designate as z] sounds nothing like TMBG! Charlatans! Frauds!
While we believe these songs will evoke TMBG, we are not The Johns. As such, and even with the possible help of special guests to play instruments that are well beyond our musical capabilities, of course they’re not exactly (or in some cases at all) what The Johns would do.

What do you mean, “at least” one new song?
Depending on how many we can finish between now and December 25th, we may release two (or more!) songs on any given day. It’s like a little mystery! Jinkies, gang!

This week’s episode: we wrap up our Ireland/UK trip summary; we reveal Storm’s final smart phone decision; we tease our next Holiday Project; and hypnosis is finally discussed. Also, Storm picks up his wife at the Metro station. (Apologies once again for the lousy recording quality on Paul’s end; also, there’s some sort of strange woodpecker-y sound through much of the recording. What the hell?)

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What smart phone do you own/is the best? And what are your favorite apps for the iPhone and Android?

Featured post-show song:  “Grandma’s Christmas Dinner” by Paul and Storm

Show #066: A Suitcase’s Worth of Jaffa Cakes (Some content NSFW)

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We humbly present our contribution to the holiday song œuvre: “Grandma’s Christmas Dinner“. (Full disclosure: we’ve had this song written for over a year, and have performed it occasionally live, but never got around to recording it until now. Sue us.) Prepare your cockles for warming and your nose for Jack Frost-nippage, as we evoke a wintry land of wonder and family…

This song is kinda NSFW. (Depending on where you work, of course) But if you enjoy it, and don’t get fired, feel free to purchase the song here.

Grandma’s Christmas Dinner

This week’s episode: we’re back from the UK/Ireland; Paul is unable to do the podcast this week (for a reason that’s not mundane at all), so Storm reads Part 1 of the new teen lit sensation, “Emily and the Sexy Vampyre“.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: How do you prefer your vampires: somewhat sexy, regular sexy, or VERY sexy?

Show #065: Sexy Vampyres (Some content NSFW)

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But on the chance that they’re here to stay, we should be making money from them, too. And so we present Part 1 of “Emily and the Really Sexy Vampyre“, and operators are standing by to receive bids for the movie rights.

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

UPDATE: Part 7 now available

This week’s episode (a couple days late, sorry): we recap the first half of our UK/Ireland tour; a drunken Irishman molests Jonathan Coulton; a Paltrowian look at Paul as an angry drunk; haggis and Irn-Bru;

Finally: a couple months ago, a couple blind listeners asked us to find a creative way for them to become new members of the Brigade of Minions. We decided that you, our listeners/other Minions, should illustrate them (in any way you like), based on their descriptions of themselves. Here are those descriptions:

@dave728nc: Dave is a youthful 47, dark hair with some gray, average build with a ready smile and cherubic good looks.  A computer consultant by day, and martial artist superhero by night, his motto is, “If the computers don’t do what I tell them to do, I kick them until they cooperate.”  He has very few Twitter followers, and is never shy about shameless groveling for more.

@CarolinaWolfie: So yeah, this is me, @CarolinaWolfie. So first, as my user name kind of implies, I’m a dog person. I travel with Simba, a black Labrador service dog. She’s way up there on the cute scale. She’s tiny, but don’t let that fool you. She’s kind of like me, mostly quiet with occasional bursts of energy and affection. I have two kids–both boys–and they are both awesome young men. I have blond hair and hazel eyes. And that’s as much as you’re getting on that score, but if you offer me the right incentive things could change.

Use the above two descriptions, either literally or as a jumping-off point, as a basis for illustrating either or both of them. You can submit links to your completed work in the comments section of this post. We will choose our favorite(s) as their official Brigade of Minions submission photos. Also, if the winning illustrator(s) are existing Minions, they will receive a special award designation.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Based upon their descriptions above, illustrate one or both of our two new “wannabe” Minions; also, describe Paul had he gone the “angry drunk” route.

Show #064: A Really Useful Engine (Some content NSFW)

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This week’s hastily-assembled, somewhat addled episode: we discuss our personal impressions of w00tstock; our failed attempts to make our friends love things; Paul’s irrational love of “Glee“, Storm abuse, and fake Chicago trivia; and our man-crush on Mike Phirman. (Again, apologies for the obnoxious sound quality)

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What would you like to see at upcoming w00tstocks? Also, tell us your five wishes.

Show #063: Like a Hundred Favorite Uncles (Some content NSFW)

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The Way-Too-Early Christmas Song (Right-click and choose “Save file as…” or however the heck you do it on your computer)

Way-Too-Early Christmas Monster art by Len Peralta.

True story: w00tstock was born because we wanted to schedule a few dates in California; but not having toured out there on our own (without the protective sheath of Jonathan Coulton’s fanbase to bolster the crowds), we weren’t sure how strong the attendance would be. So we called the two most famous California-based geeks we knew, Wil Wheaton and Adam Savage, in the hopes that one of them might be interested in performing with us.

Then they BOTH said yes. Without hesitation. And they had some “ideas”.

Things snowballed quickly, with everyone’s enthusiasm and input combining to evolve into the “w00tstock” concept: a full evening of entertainment celebrating all things geek.

A strict, thorough chronology isn’t really possible—well, sure, it’s *possible*; we’re just too damn sleep-deprived to coherently reconstruct the timeline—and also, plenty of evidence is showing up on the Intertubes, including pictures, video and blog posts. So we’ll just list various highlights from the whirlwind that was this past Monday through Wednesday…

• Watching people’s faces (including Wil’s) as they heard Kid Beyond do his incredible beatbox/live-looping for the first time.
• The wave of incredulity that passed through the gang backstage after people who had been working with and admiring Molly Lewis for three days finally learned that she is just nineteen years old.
• Seeing screenwriter Josh Cagan, whom most of the crowd in L.A. had never heard of, completely win over the audience by minutely breaking down 30 horrible seconds from the Roger Corman version of Fantastic Four.
• Kasper Hauser’s dramatic reading of their ongoing correspondence with a 419 scammer–a sketch that is even funnier, we discovered, with accompanying PowerPoint slides.
• Finally getting to see Hard ‘n Phirm perform live, and thus more fully understanding why we hate them so goddamn much (i.e. because they are awesome and hilarious)
• Jeff Lewis KILLING IT doing “World of Warcraft” standup as his character Vork (from “The Guild“)
• Jamming on an acoustic version of “(Do You Wanna Date My) Avatar” with Felicia Day, Sandeep Parikh and Jeff Lewis
• The pure joy of being onstage with Wil & Adam at the end of each evening as they joined us in increasingly-epic versions of “The Captain’s Wife’s Lament”—culminating on Wednesday night with a 15+-minute “In-a-Gadda-da-Vida” of fake cover band names and “R”-based pun one-upsmanship.

And last but probably most of all, getting to see so many geeks and nerds in one place enjoying the whole production as much as we enjoyed putting it together, extended by the love-fest meet and greet afterwards. Thank you all.

Finally, we make you this promise: there will be a w00tstock 2.x.

Get five spooky songs—Cruel, Cruel Moon; Live; Lame Monster Party; Here Come the Dinosaurs; and The Way-Too-Early Christmas Song—for the low, low price of $2. (NOTE: Yes, The Way-Too-Early Christmas Song isn’t really “spooky,” per se; but it’s Halloween-themed, so shut up)

Be the envy of all your Halloween Super-Fun Pack-less friends, and get more than a rock this All Hallow’s Eve!

This week’s episode: An embarrassment of “wait…what?” riches, we record our first multi-guest podcast, with Jonathan Coulton, Bill Stiteler, and @birdchick. In Neil Gaiman’s house. Specifically, in his sauna. And the participants are varying levels of tipsy/drunk. Can any good possibly come of this, folks? Answer: probably not. (NOTE: For the record, everyone was wearing bathing suits) (ALSO NOTE: Apologies for the obnoxious sound quality)

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done while drunk? Also, in what pursuit(s) are you a true “amateur?”

Show #062: Don’t Podcast Drunk, Kids! (Some content NSFW)

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This week’s episode: We break down our experience with the Flood Show; contemplating other “complete album” performances; geek-appropriate sports; movies that make us cry (at least, one of us); a heartfelt plug for Tiny Run; and w00tstock guests are announced (and hinted at).

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What other whole albums should we cover in concert? And what movies make you cry?

Show #061: Everybody’s Pounding Together (Some content NSFW)

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This week’s episode: we bust on 2012 and outrunning the Apocalypse; we issue a challenge for helping a couple of our blind listeners to join the Brigade of Minions; Paul organizes a new Algonquin Round Table (of sorts); Battle of the Network Stars; the question of duos with “group” names; serious songs; Storm is a supertaster; favorite drinks and fries in a holster; and Uncle Storm tells another story.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Suggest a name for us other than “Paul and Storm,” and Paul will decide if any of the suggestions aren’t stupid. Also, go harrass @Jasonfinn on Twitter.

Show #060: Shlumpy Rumplehead (Some content NSFW)

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Wed., December 9 – 7 pm
Music Hall of Williamsburg – Brooklyn, NY
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: http://bit.ly/4EoGwL

Next: as we recently announced on Twitter, our show in Chicago next week (October 10 @ Park West) will now also be a Flood show. What is a “Flood” show, you ask? You can read Jonathan’s announcement for full details, but the quick version is this: geek icon band They Might Be Giants is performing in Chicago the same night we are, and they are performing their album Flood in its entirety. And now, we’re going to do the same thing. Why? Because it’s there. So now, we’ll be performing somewhat truncated sets of our own music, we’ll take a break, and then do all 19 tracks from Flood. Heck, we’ve got a whole week to learn them all, and we already know one; no sweat, right?

Finally, here’s a few other cool things we’ve been meaning to mention for a while:

• “Opening Band” is now available for Rock Band as an officially-released downloadable, playable song for XBox 360 and PS3. (Sorry, Wii-ers!) Now you can be us, right down to the 34-second last note!
• Our friend Spiff’s video for “Cruel Cruel Moon” took second place in Blizzcon’s Machinima contest. Good on you, Spiff!
• Here’s a video for “Live” made in Little Big Planet (via fan Nikolas)

We’re sure there’s other stuff we’re forgetting, but that’ll do for now.

This week’s episode: Storm flies solo and accepts your pity; to trash or to praise Paul; a plan to smash the guitar is revealed; comic books and Asimov; slagging on the Caldecott Medal;  and “The Five Little Pickles”.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What did you read when you were a child? Were there particular kids books you liked or loathed?

Featured post-show song:  “Happy, Happy, Happy” by Groovelily

Show #059: Kids Like Colors (Some content NSFW)

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Also, in honor of our friends across the pond, we shall list these dates in the backward European style, with the day before the month. Glasnost!

Fri, 6 Nov: Dublin
Mon, 9 Nov: Edinburgh
Tue, 10 Nov: Glasgow
Thu, 12 Nov: Manchester – Manchester Academy 3
Fri, 13 Nov: London – Union Chapel
Sun, 15 Nov: Bristol

This week’s episode: Almost nothing of substance, but in a fun way; some of our favorite Sesame Street music moments; Paul runs away to take care of his dogs; favorite candy bars, and Paul’s unusual eating habits; Storm’s odd comparison of yellow Starburst candies to the taste of hair; and great food in Boulder, CO.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What is your favorite candy bar, and do you have any special/unusual eating methods? Also, for UK listeners: how do you eat your Jaffa Cakes?

Featured post-show song:  “Shake It ‘n’ Break It” by Baby Gramps

Show #058: Dirk Benedict’s Oatmealery (Some content NSFW)

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In honor of the one day each year when geeks of every stripe lift their voices together and assault their families, co-workers, barristas, and other landlubbers with a hail of “arrrrr”s, we’re offering our pirate anthem “The Captain’s Wife’s Lament” as a FREE DOWNLOAD.

Or, if you’d prefer, we can tell ye that YE MUST PAY FOR ALL OUR MUSIC, OR ELSE, and then go ahead and do what ye must.

The Captain’s Wife’s Lament (Right-click and choose “Save file as…” or however the heck you do it on your computer)

UPDATE: You can also enjoy the excellent WoW-animated video for the song, courtesy of Spiff…

Thurs.-Fri., September 17-18 – Thurs. 8 pm, Fri. 9 pm
Soiled Dove Underground – Denver, CO
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: Thurs. – http://bit.ly/r3dm7
Fri. – http://bit.ly/6nkNU

Sat., September 19 – 8 pm
Off Broadway – St. Louis, MO
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: http://bit.ly/vFfhr

Thurs., September 24 – 7 pm
Iron Horse Music Hall – Northampton, MA
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: http://bit.ly/m6sLe

Fri., September 25 – 7 pm
Toad’s Place – New Haven, CT
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: http://bit.ly/dMqhX

Sat., September 26 – 9 pm
The Paradise – Boston, MA
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: http://bit.ly/4FptU3

Thurs. October 8 – 8 pm
The Ark – Ann Arbor, MI
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: http://bit.ly/e0wMl

Sat., October 10 – 8 pm
Park West – Chicago, IL
with Jonathan Coulton
Tickets: http://bit.ly/G6Dbz

Fri. October 16 – 8 pm
Nightcat – Easton, MD
Tickets: http://bit.ly/mFEWZ

JoCoPaStoMania! It’s totally gear. Spread the word; with your support, we could get wider than Jesus!

This week’s episode: a recounting of disappointing purchases (including “The Magic Printer“, Slip ‘n’ Slide, and sea monkeys), Jean Shephard style; Storm’s summer camp Jewish redneck water slide experience; Paul sets himself up to get smacked down by the Twilight moms; we invent Blow-Up Zombie Boys, a young-male analogue for the Twilight series; stage fright manifestations; Storm stands firm on Stilton; and some quick breakfast opinions. Also, watch “The Legend of Neil“.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What were some of your disappointing purchases, either from childhood or adulthood? Also, are we out of good monsters?

Featured post-show song:  “Theme (NES)” by Metroid Metal

Show #057: The Litany of Disappointments (Some content NSFW)

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We’d heard about Penny Arcade Expo (PAX) several years ago, thanks to various friends of ours who had been there. For the uninitiated, PAX is a gaming convention in Seattle, WA started in 2004 by the creators of Penny Arcade (a webcomic of which—though we would never admit so publicly—we only understand about 50% of the jokes). This year, they decided for some silly reason to invite us to perform. Never ones to say “no” to a free hotel room, we eagerly accepted before they could change their minds.

Most of Thursday was spent on logistics: we got into town that afternoon, went to pick up the approximately 8,000,000,006 boxes of merch Coulton and we had pre-shipped to Seattle (many thanks to our friend Doug for letting us fill his garage with all our crap), transported it all to the convention center, went back to the airport to retrieve Coulton, and finally settled in for some late drinks with various cool and/or famous friends (Wil Wheaton, MC Frontalot, several folks form The Guild, and a bunch of our Harmonix pals)

Friday morning, we headed back to the convention center, and got our first taste of the true scale of things…

Most of Friday was split between sitting at our merch booth (which, thanks to the help of our merch volunteer army, ran like clockwork) and visiting the exhibition hall and previewing neato new games. Also, there was a sound check for our one-song guest stint later that evening with MC Frontalot, which included the aforementioned Wil Wheaton and his fake guitar…

Man, that guy was everywhere this weekend.

So anyway, things chugged along at a reasonable pace for most of the weekend. (Other than Storm being a little sick on Friday afternoon) That is, until the Saturday night concert…

We have to be careful with our adjectives here, so as not to fall into hyperbole. So attempting to discuss the concert objectively and dispassionately, we can only describe it as the most awesomely super-awesome thing ever, sitting on top of a pile of awesomeness. With awesome sauce. And more awesome sauce on the side, for dipping.

Before we even got started, the Ubiquitous Wheaton started things off with a tribute to Coulton:

…and then we stepped out into a veritable ocean of geek love with ~6,000 hyped-up people primed to have a good time. Much of the rest was a blur of lights, panties and “w00t”s and the occasional *squee*; suffice to say that we felt like real, full-on, honest-to-[deity] rock stars. Luckily, folks have recorded it for posterity, and video is starting to trickle onto the netterwebs. We do know that, at some point, our set ended and Jonathan Coulton went on stage and powneded as usual, with our old friend/enemy Molly joining the party; and somewhere along the way, we think we sang a song to Wil Wheaton (who apparently hadn’t had enough attention drawn to him yet)…

After the show, and then all day Sunday, we sat at our merch table and signed, signed, signed. We sure did sign! Boy, did we sign! We met hundreds of new friends, sold a lot of our crap quality merchandise, and generally cruised through the day with big, fat shit-eating grins. Once we closed up shop, we had time for one last quick meal with our “Guild”/”Legend of Neil” friends…

And then it was time to box everything up, head back to the hotel, and sleep for 3.5 hours before our pre-morning flights. (And then for Paul to be sick the next day. Fortunes of war.)

We cannot thank everyone enough—from Mike, Jerry and Robert in “management” to all the awesome Enforcers who unquestioningly did our bidding, to all the fans, both established and new—for making us feel so…well, let’s just say it: for making us feel so darn special this past weekend. If we could, we would do this to each and every one of you:

This week’s episode: Ducks line up in a row and ask to be shot by Paul and Storm, including an additional w00tstock show, and the release of “Opening Band” on Rock Band, and, of course, PAX; a detailed chronology of our PAX experience, and what it all meant to us;  Wil Wheaton, the Pope of PAX; lonely Tweets; the joy of being booed by 6,000 people; and the crowd voted for Pedro.

(Photo above courtesy of Tony Thayer)

Featured post-show song:  “Diseases of Yore” by Mc Frontalot

Show #056: A “G.I. Joe” Explosion (Some content NSFW)

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w00tstock: three hours of geeks and music

v1.0:  Monday, October 19 – Swedish American Hall, San Francisco, CA SOLD OUT!!!
2nd SF show added! v1.0.1:  Tuesday, October 20 – Swedish American Hall, San Francisco, CA
v1.1:  Wednesday, October 21 – Largo, Los Angeles, CA

Click here for complete details

This week’s (lengthy) episode: secret cool things are finally revealed; a minionhood conundrum is thrown to the audience for solutions; Acknowledgement Day is marked; Ralph Malph memories; we go over the evolution of “I Will Sing a Lullabye“, with much love for Brendan Milburn; Alton Brown, oats, haggis and swords; the big, final reveal of w00tstock, our upcoming shows with Adam Savage and Wil Wheaton; and Storm recounts an painfully awkward dinner.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: Aspiring want-to-be-minions @CarolinaWolfie and @Dave728NC are blind, and therefore it would be difficult for them to submit pictures for minionhood. How should they properly and officially declare their intent to become minions? Also, who do YOU want to see at w00tstock?

Featured post-show song:  “I Will Sing a Lullabye” by Paul and Storm

Show #055: There Will Definitely Be Screaming Involved (Some content NSFW)

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We actually started writing this one over a year ago, but apparently it needed to age like a good cheese or whiskey before we could finally finish it off, and give it the full treatment it deserves. As a side note, Coldplay can suck it.

Many thanks to the super-talented Brendan Milburn for his considerable help on keyboard, bass, strings and drum programming.

This song is probably NSFW. (Depending on where you work, of course) But if you enjoy it, and don’t get fired, feel free to purchase the song here.

I Will Sing a Lullabye

This week’s episode: Some self-indulgent whining about how hard it is to be us—or, at least, to lug around t-shirts; large crowd nerves, and fear of cursing on national radio; musings about synthesized instrumentation and various favorite childhood cartoons (and live-action shows); Storm introduces his Word-of-the-Month; and he used to cry a lot. Also, Paul forgets the call letters for WTAF-TV.

AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION ALERT: What was your favorite childhood cartoon and/or live-action show?

Featured post-show song:  “The Commander Thinks Aloud” by The Long Winters

Show #054: It’s a Similar Idiom (Some content NSFW)

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